Yes and No...

"Will you play games with me?"  

"Can I have another snack?"

 "Can I play with my friends?" 

"Can i help you?"  

"Will you help me"

I am amazed at the amount of times every day in which I have to say these two words:  YES and NO.

Sometimes the sheer volume of questions and the impending deductive reasoning exercises I must force myself to engage in to come up with an answer is quite overwhelming.  Most of the time, the answer is easy, "No, you may not jump off the top bunk."  or  "Yes, I heard you ask if you can skip doing your homework and watch one more episode of Jonas... but I'm positive that you already know what the answer to that question will be, my sweet child."

But other times, I am forced to weigh the options, look at the big picture, think ahead, and try to stick to my guns even in the times when I would rather let them all fend for themselves and just leave me be.

I'm not a big decision maker.  Some people revel in taking charge and making choices.  Me, I'd rather have somebody else do it for me.  I'm fairly laid back at home, and so for most things I have to muster up the energy to establish and enforce my answers.

This indecision (and a nagging people pleaser problem that I'm ruthlessly trying to rid myself of) make those two little words weightier.  I am realizing that I'm too quick with my "yes" and "no".  I am convicted that I do not spend enough time asking the Holy Spirit to guide my "yeah's" and "nay's."  I want to be more purposeful in how I spend my time and energy.

God has really been challenging me in this area.  What am I saying "yes" to, that instead, I should be saying "no?"  What am I saying "no" to, that should be warranting an enthusiastic "yes?"  He is calling me to make some big changes in my life and I am struggling in walking out those decisions in obedience.  But I learned a long time ago, that I made Jesus LORD of my life, and that means that HE gets to tell me what to do, and my job is simply to do what He says.

SO, for me, God is challenging me to say more "yes's" to... "Mom, will you sit down and read this book to me?" More "no's" to wasting time on Facebook.   More "yes's" to studying and writing.  More "no's" to putting my husband's needs behind everyone else.  "Yes's" to patience, perseverance, and advocating for my children.  "No's" to feeling like I have to do everything for everybody.

But that's MY stuff.  What's YOUR stuff?  Maybe for you, you need to say more "yes's" to serving outside your home and more "no's" to too many kids activities.  Maybe you need to say "no" to that boss who is asking too much of you and say "yes" to something you feel you should be doing to make your marriage stronger?  Maybe you need to clean less and play more. (This is definitely not me!!!  But I know you girls are out there!!!)

All I'm saying, my friends, is that we have to continually seek God for direction for our Y's and N's - and then have the courage to walk it out.  We cannot just keep walking through our lives blindly saying "yes" and "no" without regard to God's sovereign plan and leading in our lives.  We'll get messed up doing the wrong things at the wrong time for the wrong reasons.  And that's no good for anyone.

So here's to you... may your "yes's" be full of excitement and adventure, and your "no's" full of strength and grace.

Colossions 1:9-12 - Be assured that from the first day we heard of you, we haven't stopped praying for you, asking God to give you wise minds and spirits attuned to his will, and so acquire a thorough understanding of the ways in which God works. We pray that you'll live well for the Master, making him proud of you as you work hard in his orchard. As you learn more and more how God works, you will learn how to do your work. We pray that you'll have the strength to stick it out over the long haul—not the grim strength of gritting your teeth but the glory-strength God gives. It is strength that endures the unendurable and spills over into joy, thanking the Father who makes us strong enough to take part in everything bright and beautiful that he has for us.

I love you.

Kristie 

Benefit for Leslie McClain

Good morning friends! Wanted to pass along the information for Leslie's fundraiser.

It's being held at Grizzly's Grill 'N Saloon, 15020 Glazier Avenue, Apple Valley, on the morning of Saturday, September 26th from 8:00 to 10:30 am (last seating at 10:00). The cost is $6.00 per ticket. Tickets are available for purchase at the reception desk of Apple Valley Ford Lincoln Mercury from Wednesday, September 16th through Wednesday, September 23rd. Tickets may also be reserved for purchase at the door by emailing
mclainbenefit@hotmail.com with your requested quantity. Checks can be made payable to the "Leslie McLain Donation Fund".

Grizzly's will donate the food and beverages and Thrivent Financial for Lutherans® will be matching the proceeds for this event (up to $3,200). A special thank you to both for their generosity.

On behalf of the people planning the benefit, thank you for your time.

How Do I Love Thee?

Oh, Target. Sweet Target. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I recognize that there are times that I take you for granted. Your shiny red circles. Your long kid friendly stroller carts. Your Starbucks lovingly placed for my shopping enjoyment.

Sometimes you have to stray away, before you realize what you had all along.

Yesterday, I went to Walmart.

I was in need of a few last minute school supplies (which my lovely Target was inexplicably sold out of!) so I headed off to my local Walmart. First of all, the cars in the parking lot were strangely parked wildly askew. Are their lines crooked? Is the Walmart shopper unable to line up their car with the painted lines? I was perplexed.

Then I tried to get a cart. For ALL my kids. You know, a multi-seater where I can strap in 2, throw one in the front, and let one hang off the back like the responsible mother I am. No big carts in sight. My children were forced to run around unrestrained which inevitably leads to a cart full of secretly hidden items which I have no idea where they came from. Did I really pick up 5 boxes of Fruit Gushers and not remember it?

Then I tried to push my teeny tiny cart through an aisle where some "associates" were stocking a shelf. Between their carts and the 3 other people standing there watching them, I couldn't get through. So I stood there. And I stood there. I kind of cleared my throat a little. Finally, I said, "Pardon me, can I sneak through, please?" No kidding... with the S -L-O-W-E-S-T movement possible, they painstakingly moved like 2 feet so I could inch by with my brood of children.

But the kicker...we decided to hit the restrooms on the way out. 3 of the 5 stalls have half taped on handwritten signs that say, "out of order." I'm waiting for my kids to come out of the stalls when an associate from the customer service desk comes in with a gallon of milk that has been returned because its gone bad. She opens it up and starts pouring it down the drain, filling the room with the fine aroma of spoiled milk! In the customer's bathroom!!!

So, Target, I know I strayed. I got sucked into the promise of cheaper diapers and Miley Cyrus clothing lines. But I've learned my lesson. I'm yours... eternally.

It's the Little Victories...

Ok, ok. Don't fall off your chairs or anything. I have been on a bit of a blogging "hiatus." I guess that would be quite an understatement, since my last post was from February. Oh well, such is life. And today is a new day and I'm ready to get rolling again.

We have had a major breakthrough at the Kerr house this summer. It has revolutionized our family dynamic, comforted my anxious heart, and brought joy and happiness to our whole clan. What is this monumental milestone? Charlie learned to ride his bike.

Yup. That's it. My 8 year old boy has finally crossed over into the ranks of the fearless and reckless boy-bike-riders. Now this might not seem like a big deal to you. But like I said before, it's a HUGE deal to us.

First of all, it has been something my husband has tirelessly worked towards for 3 summers in a row. Charlie has been terrified of his bike. (after a major wipeout... and a general lack of motivation for "thrill seeking activities.") And he has struggled with some large motor coordination - so it was actually a difficult thing physically for him to do. So - Dad gets the prize for tenacity and patience.

Secondly, it has encouraged me in my general "mom/worry" emotional state. I have to admit that I have some latent fears when it comes to my son. I guess when the kid arrives on the planet 12 weeks early, and the doctors give you a laundry list of things he "might not be able to do..." you always have in the back of your mind an anxiety that he will face extraordinary obstacles. Seeing my kid riding down the street yelling, "woo-hoo" all crazy and fast still chokes this poor mom up. Call me crazy... but it just gets to me. It's just another confirmation of God's faithfulness that He not only healed my son when he was a baby, but that He continues to heal my son as he grows and faces new obstacles and challenges.

I share this with you, my sweet friends, because I know that many of you have your own list of fears, worries, and seemingly endless milestones that you are walking through with your kids. Maybe its a behavior that you are battling every day - trying to consistently address and discipline. Maybe its a difficulty at school - and you are seeking God for the wisdom to know how to help your child overcome a disability or conflict. Maybe its potty training!!! Don't even get me started on that!

I mean, we all know that most kids aren't going to go to kindergarten in a diaper - they'll eventually get it, right! But that doesn't mean that the months that go by where you endlessly saying, "Do you have to go potty?" Do you have to go potty?" "Lets go to the potty..." any less difficult.

It's these small things that most people would say are an incidental part of life - but they are the moments that make up yours and my days. And the monotony of facing these issues day after day can become very tiring. You can start to get frustrated, start worrying and sometimes even loose hope.

So - I share my story with you to say, "Don't be discouraged, Mom!" Keep plugging away. Know that God is there to breathe wisdom and grace into your heart and mind so that you can be the best mother possible. Throw your frustrations at His feet and trust that He's got your little ones in the palm of His great big loving hand.

Sometimes, its just the little victories that give us hope to keep going.

Kirsten's 25 Random Things

1. My name is Kirsten (pronounced Kursten) but the traditional Swedish way to say it is Kyersten.

2. In 1st grade there was a Kirsten (that's me) a Kristen and a Kyrsten, I think my teacher went nuts trying to keep all us blonds straight.

3. I met my hubby Cy in the early 90's when I was in high school and he was done with college, we married in 2000 and have 2 beautiful kids.

4. I've appeared on channel 5, 9 and 11 and have been featured in both the Star Tribune and St. Paul Pioneer Press for various, but very special segments.

5. I want a tattoo, but will probably never get one. 

6. I DESPISE snakes, toy or real and freeze up at the thought of an encounter with one, toy or real, one day on accident.

7. I make goals for myself according to my age, so this year I have 34 things I'd like to try and do.

8. I've been to Guatemala and Mexico on missions trips.

9. The next missions trip I would like to take is to Africa.

10. I want to go skydiving this summer

11. I love to make cards for any and every occasion, I don't htink I've bought a card in 4 or 5 years.

12. The longest I've been all by myself on a trip is 36 hours.

13. I was born on Friday the 13th!

14 I love entering amature cooking contests.

15. I am comfortable when flip my pinky toe over the next biggest toe...I sit like that when I'm working, watching movies, driving the car (yes, I can do it in my shoes if I try) ect...my husband tries to undo my toe, but I just flip it right back, it drives him NUTS!

16. My paperwork is organized chaos, I never loose anything and can tell you which pile something is in.  

17. I wanted to be a professional ice skater when I was younger.

18. If I wasn't married with kids I think I would go into the world of entertainment - tv or radio something fun.

19. I was a teacher for 3 years and had the same class 2 of the 3 years.  The second time around my students really knew me, so my whole "play strict the first few weeks to lay down the law in the classroom" bit didn't work...even on the new students.

20. I lived in the same house for 32 years, we live 2 miles from it and my mom still lives there so it's fun to see my kids run around that yard now.

21. I love playing card games - Hearts and Nuts are my favorite, but we just learned a new one called 5 Crowns.

22. My favorite smell is a roast in the crock pot - reminds me of coming home after church growing up to a roast dinner.

23. I was a pastor's kid growing up, everyone knew me so when I wandered in the kitchen while the church ladies were preparing food for a wedding no one gave me a second thought...until I took a large swipe out of the front of the wedding cake...the brides mom wasn't too happy, the frosting was a special cream color and couldn't be matched before the reception....come on I was 4 or 5 years old, what kid that age wouldn't have done the same thing.

24. I LOVE LOVE LOVE Indian food, probably because when we adopted my brother (he was 2 months old) we attended a lot of Indian events and were usually the only white people there, but it was such a wonderful experience....oh that smell, I remember it like it was yesterday.

25. I LOVE MY HEAVENLY FATHER WITH ALL MY HEART AND AM SO GRATEFUL TO KNOW HIM AND TO HAVE BEEN SAVED BY HIM.

Kari's 25 Random Things

1. I love reading other peoples 25 Random Things.......... but hate to think of my own. This goes along with email chains as well. SO will be like pulling teeth.

2. I am 1/2 Italian yet I think I am 100%.

3. I am the oldest of three biological sisters. I have a half brother. I also have 3 step sisters, and three step brothers.

4. I love to cook and try new recipes. I love when Scott and I can cook together.

5. I love to check my mailbox. I love when there is a letter and not just bills.

6. I have a subscription to Southern Living Magazine. When it comes it is a very happy day. I will read it in one sitting. I always start from the back.

7. Moving from Charlotte, North Carolina was one of the hardest events in my life. Yet, I knew that God was with us every step of the way. He has proven that to us time and time again.

8. I still miss the south,........... southern things......... southern food, manners.... and monograming.

9. I think that Chic if la chicken biscuits are the most amazing sinful breakfast treats.

10. I think that it's funny that the first boy I ever kissed at age 13 is on Face-book.

11. My sophomore year of college I went skydiving with Chauntelle. I hope my girls never do that.

12. I have never been across the "big pond". My dream is to go to Austria and Italy with Scott.

13. My dream job would be to be a professional organizer. I know that is really funny-!! But true.

14. I became a Christian when I was 5. Yet I did not learn to know Christ and have a relationship with him until after I had Madison. I was 28.

15. I love a good thunder and lightening storm. The bigger and louder, the better.

16. I would rather go to the OB/GYN, that to the dentist. Sorry Heather and Nada:)

17. My parents divorced when I was 9. I never remember them fighting ever.

18. I have become who I am by being surrounded my amazing friends.

19. I met Scott in a bar. I will forever be grateful to Jennifer and Bubba West. Thank you for Bubba being there at the right time with Scott and Jennifer for dragging me out. That night changed my life forever. I love my husband more than anything in the world.

20. I love being a wife to Scott and mother to Madison and Amelia.

21. Back in the day, I thought Donnie Osmond was the best thing since sliced bread. I once went to one of their concerts and he kissed my hand. I was all of 8. Didn't think I would ever wash my hands.

22. I have lived in 5 states. Georgia, Florida, South and North Carolina and Minnesota. I have lived in 18 houses/apartments/townhomes. I should have this moving thing down pat.

23. I went to a Women's College (Converse) my Freshman year college. I wen to classes in my PJs.

24. I think that the North Carolina Mountains are one of the most magical places on earth.

25. This was right up there with going to Dentis

25 Random Things...

I'm a bit of a Facebook junkie. It makes me feel like I can keep in touch with what's going on in the lives of the people I care about without having to talk on the phone. (Really HATE talking on the phone, actually)

So - there's a new thing floating around on Facebook... 25 Random Things About Me. You make a list of 25 random things about yourself and share it with your friends. SO, below you will find my list. And in the next couple weeks, the leadership/teaching team from Moms Group will be sharing their lists too, so you can get to know ALL of us a little better!!! Enjoy!

1. I am addicted to peanut butter M&M's
2. We have a group of 6 friends that celebrate birthdays together... we always laugh so hard my throat hurts the next day.
3. When I met Jeff, I was dating another guy named Jeff, and so my parents nicknamed Jeff Kerr "weekday Jeff" and the other guy "weekend Jeff" so they could tell them apart when they called for me. I picked the right Jeff.
4. My sister is my best friend.
5. My mom is the most gracious woman I know
6. My dad is my hero.
7. I have spent 7 months of my life laying in bed on doctors orders for pregnancies... worth every second.
8. My son almost died when he was 2 days old - he was born 12 weeks premature. Jesus healed him. I still tear up every time Charlie laughs.
9. My kids fascinate me - and I think they are the sun and the moon
10. I cringe when I think about my youthful years... I was REALLY uptight.
11. I spent a summer living with my Grandma in Nebraska when I was 19. I checked groceries at Baily's Town & Country market and dated the president of the Future Farmers of America.
12. I hate cleaning my house and will do almost anything to avoid it.
13. I never listen to music unless I'm working. It jumbles my head and I can't think.
14. Most of my creative ideas happen when I'm doing dishes.
15. I think I get less confident the older I get - but I've also made peace with who I am and don't feel the need to please everyone NEAR as much as I did when I was younger.
16. I was the music director at a church shaped like Noah's Ark. i had a porthole window in my office.
17. I love articulate people.
18. My father in law intrigues me.
19. I love dreaming big - and very often my creativity and the constraints of reality come crashing down on my head.
20. My husband is the best thing that has ever happened to me. He is nothing like what I thought I wanted - but has changed me for the better in innumerable ways. And he gets better with age.
21. I don't worry a lot.
22. I am writing a book.
23. I am a teacher at heart - and love helping people find and refine their gifts.
24. I am constantly growing in my faith - and feel like I am just getting an understanding of how much God loves me.
25. I can stay home for long stretches of time as long as I have my family and good food.

Here We Go!

Are you ready!  We are getting ready to start up Moms Group again!  I have missed seeing all your beautiful faces and seeing you all connecting and sharing your lives with each other!

We will start the next session on Jan 13/14.  We will be studying "Boundaries With Kids" which is one of my ALL TIME FAVORITE studies on parenting.  It is a fantastic resource for kids of any age - teaching responsibility and discipline.  I encourage you to come and bring a friend.  This is a great opportunity to invite a neighbor or girlfriend who might not be interested in a "church" study - but WOULD be interested in learning how to be a better mom!

I know it can be hard to get out of the house when its cold and you need to find all the hats and mittens, etc!  Minnesota winters can be a really isolating time for moms.  But I want to encourage you to take the time to do this for yourself and for your kids.  You need to have time where you can connect with other women and support each other.  

Looking forward to seeing you all!