Wednesday, September 2, 2009

How Do I Love Thee?

Oh, Target. Sweet Target. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I recognize that there are times that I take you for granted. Your shiny red circles. Your long kid friendly stroller carts. Your Starbucks lovingly placed for my shopping enjoyment.

Sometimes you have to stray away, before you realize what you had all along.

Yesterday, I went to Walmart.

I was in need of a few last minute school supplies (which my lovely Target was inexplicably sold out of!) so I headed off to my local Walmart. First of all, the cars in the parking lot were strangely parked wildly askew. Are their lines crooked? Is the Walmart shopper unable to line up their car with the painted lines? I was perplexed.

Then I tried to get a cart. For ALL my kids. You know, a multi-seater where I can strap in 2, throw one in the front, and let one hang off the back like the responsible mother I am. No big carts in sight. My children were forced to run around unrestrained which inevitably leads to a cart full of secretly hidden items which I have no idea where they came from. Did I really pick up 5 boxes of Fruit Gushers and not remember it?

Then I tried to push my teeny tiny cart through an aisle where some "associates" were stocking a shelf. Between their carts and the 3 other people standing there watching them, I couldn't get through. So I stood there. And I stood there. I kind of cleared my throat a little. Finally, I said, "Pardon me, can I sneak through, please?" No kidding... with the S -L-O-W-E-S-T movement possible, they painstakingly moved like 2 feet so I could inch by with my brood of children.

But the kicker...we decided to hit the restrooms on the way out. 3 of the 5 stalls have half taped on handwritten signs that say, "out of order." I'm waiting for my kids to come out of the stalls when an associate from the customer service desk comes in with a gallon of milk that has been returned because its gone bad. She opens it up and starts pouring it down the drain, filling the room with the fine aroma of spoiled milk! In the customer's bathroom!!!

So, Target, I know I strayed. I got sucked into the promise of cheaper diapers and Miley Cyrus clothing lines. But I've learned my lesson. I'm yours... eternally.


6 comments:

Kari Cornwell said...

Kristie. Oh how you make me laugh!!! Guess where we where yesterday!! Walmart!!! Guess what Amliea had to do in the middle of shopping.? Yep! You guessed it. Her afternoon "call". Do you know how I hate public restrooms? Especially Walmart restrooms. Yuck! Gross.!! I met up with Kirsten Nissly later at the park, and had this same conversation about Walmart and how I will not go again. I could have written the same thing, but you make it oh so funny!!

Kari Cornwell said...

Kristie. Oh how you make me laugh!!! Guess where we where yesterday!! Walmart!!! Guess what Amliea had to do in the middle of shopping.? Yep! You guessed it. Her afternoon "call". Do you know how I hate public restrooms? Especially Walmart restrooms. Yuck! Gross.!! I met up with Kirsten Nissly later at the park, and had this same conversation about Walmart and how I will not go again. I could have written the same thing, but you make it oh so funny!!

annelane said...

I could have warned you!! But some things you must learn on your own, sweet daughter.

Jamie Willow said...

except for the Mary Kate and Ashley eye liner...I don't go there either any more :)

Kirsten Shabaz said...

That is HILARIOUS! I am in total agreement...not a fan of it either...Target is my favorite..AND I don't really think prices are that much better from what I've found in what little I have purchased there...

J said...

I feel icky just walking into Walmart and forget about bringing children! Yikes! You are so brave.